The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I’ve decided upon an action. The action, though sudden, is prolonged. The action, though subtle, is obvious. I’ve decided that there shouldn’t be anything to affect me. I’ve decided that these minuscule actions and words of others don’t matter. I’ve decided that those who speak out against me, rather shocking as it is, don’t matter.



The nature of my action is one that you, the reader, the viewer, the speaker, shall not know unless you manage to interpret my intentions through my jumbled jargon of literature. This course is as such because I’m likely making myself miserable with my caring nature and forgiving attitude. The way that I am is a way that is susceptible. Does this mean I should change my entire persona? No it does not… Rather I should alter the thoughts. I will tweak the details that make me unwary. I shall make myself once again impenetrable.



Many believe I am a troubled one. I am not. Many believe that my brain is addled, riddled with holes, that I’m slower than a toothpick. I am not. I have a sort of thought process that not many can understand. I have a way of thinking that is not entirely normal. Now while you who is reading this may think that I am strange and unnatural I am not. If I am unnatural to you then you are that to me in turn. you do not understand me. You are not like me. But no matter, I understand you. I get you.



You see I’m an observer. I know how you will react to my prodding. I predict what you will do, how you will say. Now this may be termed as creepy, but is it really? We observe one another on a daily basis as it is on a lesser level. I happen to look deeper at your daily actions to see just why you do what you do. In the end I am able to, if I choose to, manipulate you.



There are as is the rule exceptions to this. They’re certain people whom I can not predict, whom I can not observe and understand. I gravitate towards these people. It boggles my mind like a complex jigsaw. Their persona, their actions, their mannerisms are a confounding conundrum that I will think about and analyze until the colors fade. After all of this I have barely managed to, through sheer concentration, managed to break through that first barrier that is buried in the endless maze of mind.



You. Who are you? If I were to analyze you what would I find? What would I know? What would you think when I told you what you were thinking at that very moment. Would you label me a loon and have me confined to endless white? Or would you appreciate the ability? Either way I am me.



So why am I like this? I believe that through the years my interactions with all sorts of people have brought about a sort of thing in me that allows me to accurately predict. Going through the many schools, living in the many areas, growing through the many changes, and adapting whilst shaping the future. I believe that living in so many places has allowed me to meet more people than most would have at my age. This in turn has let me have this occurrence.



The irony of this is that throughout my life I was a loner. I was the teacher’s pet. The one whose hand was the fastest to shoot up and had the answers. Through being the loner I was able to observe people. I was able to get a handle on what certain characteristics would make people do what. Through being a loner I changed. I was accepting of all and conscious of actions.



Now through my writing have you been able to interpret my action? Have you been able to observe through my words what I am thinking? I think not for there is no longer an action to be taken. The action has transpired in the midst of the writing. I let you in on a piece of a mind. That is the action. I showed you what I think, what I know. Call it as you want it.



-Jacob D. Lujan